I don't live as far away as some do from their families, but sometimes it feels like a 1000 miles is closer to a million...because you just can't up and go when you want.
Why today do I need to reflect on this, as I sit here writing through tears... my in-laws who have been visiting from Toronto since before Christmas, and who had planned to stay for another two weeks had to leave suddenly this morning when we got news that a close friend to them and brother-in-law to Wayne's aunt and uncle passed away last night after a long battle with Osteo Sarcoma. His condition had been deteriorating for some time since the holidays and in a way it is a blessing that he is out of pain, but death and the finality of it makes it hard to bear. So of course, as soon as they heard the news, they were packing and heading home to provide comfort to Ralph's wife Jean and of course Aunt Diane and Uncle Gord and all of their families...
and two things struck me... I'm going to miss them like crazy, although I know they had to go... but having family here makes a whole lof of difference to my state of mind... and I can't be there... I've missed so many things by being away from family. We haven't been home for Christmas in 3 years and summer for two... in that time, my niece was born, learned to walk and talk and became a toddler, almost preschooler (she's precocious), my grandparents have moved twice - both times to nursing homes so that Grandma's overall health and Grandpa's alzheimers can be managed most effectively. My sister has gotten engaged, had an engagement party and a shower already, been shopping for her dress and all of that... and I guess what is hitting home today is that everything is finite... and changing so quickly..
We've been lucky through our immigration woes to have had lots of visits from my in-laws, my parents, my siblings and friends but every time they come it is hard to let them go. Most days its okay...I keep busy with the kids, the volunteering and socializing with friemds, but its days like today that it all just hits the fan... and I wind up in a puddle of gooey tears...
Tomorrow will be a better day and the countdown is on for our trip home this summer...
